I should really be trying to sleep (test tomorrow, blecch), but I wanted to recap all the weird shit that has made up the past two days first. yesterday my alarm didn't go off (I forgot to turn it on) and I slept through my two day classes. when I woke up I was really depressed about that, so I kept making myself go back to sleep. ever done that? anyway, I finally got up and decided I was too upset to go to night class either, so I went for a drive. I drove all the way to roanoke, in fact. I bought some mill mountain coffee, ate dinner, and drove back. I felt better then.

that doesn't change the fact that I am so apt to have little "brain tantrums" like that. I mean, how many times have I "run away" from school, just gone home without telling anyone? no less than three mental health professionals have pronounced me to be of sound mind, but sometimes I wonder. it's can't just be ADD at fault. sometimes I really scare myself. a lot.

so tonight I was spending a pleasant evening with charles when my phone rang. first my room, then my cell. I answered it neither time, but checked my messages after c. had left. it was joey again, both times. wants to talk, he says. sounded friendly enough, but the timing of the call was enough to weird me out. I guess I'll give him a buzz; one call can't hurt. it's just that even hearing his voice now throws me off kilter. a lotta water under that bridge, folks. more than anyone could ever imagine.

oh, if only I can get through tomorrow. then I'll turn over a beautiful new leaf and lead a life of unparallelled normalcy. but how many times have I said that before...