thomas edison quit his job to start a laboratory.
charles lindbergh graduated from flight school.
sylvia plath graduated from smith and won a fulbright scholarship to cambridge.
lawrence olivier acted in his first film.
tim burton first got work in the film industry—as an animator at disney.
van morrison recorded astral weeks.
elvis costello recorded my aim is true.

I wonder if I'll do anything important while I'm 23?

also, I've seen this on a couple of other blogs and since mine is kinda funny:



create your own visited states map
or check out these Google Hacks.

heh. california's all out there and shit.

gso, post storm. while much of the triad has been icebound, I've been slip-sliding away to work these past couple of days. yesterday only 11 people showed (out of the usual 70), but today was better. hopefully the roads will keep clearing up, although the purty white stuff can stay on the ground for a while.

finally bought the b&s for fans only dvd (sorry carra, but I had to get it at fye--borders was closed and couldn't find it anywhere else). fie on anyone who doesn't at least get moved into contemplative silence by "this is just a modern rock song." stuart murdoch WILL be mine. as soon as he gets over that whole straight/not knowing who I am thing.

actually, I could walk up to 90% of the people on the street and say, "hi. I'm stuart murdoch, and I'm the lead singer of a band called belle and sebastian," and no one would know any different. I could get to know these people, make them my friends. they'd call, "hey, stuart!" on the street, legitimizing it. popular opinion could decree that I am, in fact, stuart murdoch.

maybe I am. wow. cool.

just for giggles, let's see what I ate today:
2 cinnabon minibons (22g fat, 600 cal)
1 bag puff pastry cookies (I dunno; let's be kind and say 10g fat and 300 cal)
1 sheetz smokehouse burger (52g fat, 860 cal)
1 sheetz bucket o fryz (based on wendy's, around 25g fat and 530 cal)
TOTAL (not including beverages): 109g fat, 2290 cal.

oh, and 5 cigs. I'm going to hell. soon, with clogged arteries. I really need to watch it; I've really started to give my feet the appreciation they deserve now that I can see them.

I'm wearing my retainers for the first time in like a year. go me.

I think I'm going to make it my mission to move to canada; specifically to banff, because banff pisses me off. my fourth grade teacher showed us dozens of slides from her visit there (what a miss brodie thing to do!), and it is beautiful. but there's a population cap of 10k people, and you have to meet about that many requirements to live there at all. even buying property there is illegal if you don't rent it to a "legal resident." so I'm going to find a way. just wait. then I'm going to walk the streets, point at tourists and say,"I live here and you don't." fuckin-a.

can I just say what a shockingly small difference my seemingly large raise has made in my paycheck? hardly enough to keep me in stockings and fans. or cashmere and godiva, if you will.

I really shouldn't complain so much.

speaking of work, got my w2 from united. soon I'll get the one from o.d. then I have to figure out what to do with them.

y'know the line in billy joel's "the piano man" that goes "they sit at the bar/and put bread in my jar?" when I was a kid I thought people were actually giving him bread.

12 hours of work yesterday and 9 today. kooky stuff. computers are still acting retarded (p.c. be damned, the computers are retarded. it's the only word. if they get offended I'll delete this).

although I still went to burlington for krystal munchies after work. and I don't regret a mile of it.

weekend coming up. hmm. maybe I'll call tia. she must think I'm dead.

I've yet to see the triplets of belleville in the listings of any theaters within an hour radius, and I'm getting irritated about it.

gotta run. billy joel just came in, arms laden with baked goods. must have been a good night at the 88s (I love it when people refer to piano keys as 88s).

oh, and at petrified fountain: monstrously long-winded review of big fish and the only golden globes picks you need.

tonight's theme: work.

variations on theme:

typical. everyone went home at 9:30 tonight. they were trying to fix a problem we've been having with the computers and ended up making them worse. now we all go in early and stay late tomorrow. but hey, it's still fun to have an evening off.

optimistic. just in case I do end up relocating this fall, I've been able to find a number of jobs in my interested locales that I'd be uber-qualified for. and I'd only have to take a slight pay cut...well, it's still comforting to know that I should have a much easier time finding work than I did last summer.

silly and conceited. I wore that new banana republic outfit to work yesterday and no one even commented on it! now I'm all self-conscious that it doesn't look so nice after all. hmmph.

did get to winston today. scored a cashmere sweater at like 60% off. dinner at olive garden with j and b (heh...that's a whiskey) followed by a movie, big fish, which I plan to do a lengthy p.f. post about soon. but for now, I say this: see it. please. it's one of only 4 or 5 films I've seen that have honestly made me examine life from a different perspective.

and it's put me in an introspective mood. that and a fun night out with ashley and carra at jake's, followed by buffy and snuggling with carra here. but anyway, here's the thing. I realize that I've become so caught up with my routine and my everyday goals--work, make money, do the basic things I have to do to get by--that I've lost sight of how multifaceted the human mind can be. well, maybe it's less that and more losing sight of the human spirit. I'm not saying that I've become more of a machine than a man (perish the robotic thought). but it's a friendly reminder to acknowledge that I need, to use the old cliche, to get a life.

I'm working on it. because nights like tonight remind me that a life is a good thing to have.

jake's must be slipping narcotics into their waffles, because I'm so tired. well, it is sunrise and about my bedtime, after all. ta.

and speaking of trendy, as lame as it is I thoroughly enjoy liquidgeneration. in fact, I shall now indulge in posting my results from one of their quizzes:

I didn't see the whole thing and so won't do a review, but I saw most of best laid plans the other night and actually sort of/maybe/probably liked it. I have to give her credit; throughout her career reese witherspoon has made some really commendable (and varied) role choices.

but mostly I think I just like alessandro nivola, who has become my new celeb crush. it's a good one I think--not common enough to be generic but conventionally handsome enough to wear with pride. in fact, he's finally pushed me into renting laurel canyon (I've meant to anyway). however, I will NOT rent jurassic park 3 regardless.

(note: I just highlighted and deleted a lengthy rant on the label "college rock" and mtv execs that I had typed here. my arguments weren't developed enough. but don't say "college rock;" it's even worse than the aforementioned p-word.)

I'd like to stay up and hit the trough for breakfast, but I'd also like to go to winston to shop tomorrow. which entails waking up before sunset. so off I go to curl up in bed with a cup of hot rooibos (at the risk of seeming trendy if not...gulp...outright metrosexual, have y'all tried the stuff? it's goooood).

HOLY SHIT! apparently TWO sheetz stores are being built on wendover avenue (he says stuffed full of the buffalo chicken and fryz that he just drove to virginia to get, cursing nicole for making him an addict)! that's the best news ever. EVERRRRR!

that's all for now. I'm too overcome to write any more.

oh, and one more thing.

anyone conversing with me is forbidden to use the word "pundit."

I'm tired of it.

I'll just walk away, really. try me.

question.

which version of this line from "puttin on the ritz" do you prefer?
A) come let's mix where rockefellers waltz with sticks or umbrellers in their mitts
B) come let's mix where rockefellas waltz with sticks or umbrellas in their mitts

I think that B was irving berlin's original lyric, but I have a strong preference for version A, as sung by gene wilder in young frankenstein. true, taco did sing version B, but I have to stand my ground on this one.

remember back in the day when eeeeeveryone used freeman skin/hair care products? what happened? you can still get them, but they're hard to find. I remember at one point in the mid-90s I regularly used the apricot facial scrub, the raspberry body scrub, the cucumber face mask, AND the sunflower hair infusion. I'm totally going to instigate a freeman revival. the gay teenage boys of today need to recognize.

currently working on: stop smoking, take 15.8 or so. once again, I've stocked up on gum. I think my mistake before was relying on extra. a situation of this magnitude calls for bubblicious.

I've compiled a list of the funniest things my friends have ever said (at least, the ones I can think of right now). taken out of context makes some even funnier. at the risk of pissing people off, they are ranked--with #1 being my favorite.

20. where is chair? I come from russia to see chair!
19. don’t test me; I’m unmedicated.
18. what goes on in there? HEY!
17. heh…paleface.
16. I knew a girl named rutago. she was a spice.
15. hey naked lady!
14. God bless the prostitutes.
13. when they put their heads under the water. that’s when you get ‘em.
12. I’ve been dead for three years!
11. I can handle this high performance vehicle.
10. isn’t there something about roseanne roseanna danna that’s “comin for to carry you home?”
9. caffeine suppositories? I’ll bet those really get your ass goin.
8. bread man won’t be here ‘til tuesday.
7. please. you’re paying more money for less doors. what’s the point in that?
6. josh one, autoharps zero.
5. they stand on their own.
4. that tree’s diseased.
3. well, the native americans are an ancient people.
2. he’s gone mental on account of the witch skin!
1. I don’t have any Indian food, but I can give you a toasted waffle and a picture of jude law.

hanging with heather (both heathers, actually) was a blast. saw the station agent again; was even better the second time. cute waiter at harper's, as well.

since it was sunday, tonight was girly spa night. I'm thoroughly scrubbed, exfoliated, moisturized. and ready for bed.

new at petrified fountain: gerry. seeing it has put me in an introspective mood. it's also solidified my slightly shameful crush on casey affleck.

physical attraction, for me, is kind of like this. some guys must be seen in public with; maybe they're stunning model types, or maybe they're just hip beyond belief. some guys should be screwed around with on the d.l.--maybe not so perfect, but they get you fired up for some weird reason. then there are guys whose face needs to be on the pillow next to yours when you wake up. senor affleck, I've got your pillow all fluffed and waiting.

I'm actually meeting heather for coffee and giggles tomorrow. how freakin long has it been since I've really done anything, as in going out? a while.

I got a random craving for prunes last night. that's never happened. kinda weird. have you noticed that "prunes" are now "dried plums" in the supermarket? well, did you know that america's prune farmers invested $10 million in an image campaign to make that happen? it's like, okay. they're still prunes. I've always liked them anyway.

I'm not a big football fan or anything, but did y'all see the carolina game today? I mean, fuck me gently with a chainsaw! but it sho did come out all right.

greensboro is pretty in snow, methinks. it's a shame it's going to warm up monday and melt it all. wait, no it's not. it's fuckin cold!

I found out on sunday that I can make a flawlessly risen souffle. it's good to know.

got a raise at work, and a better one than I thought. I won't be crass with specifics, but it gives my annual income a new first digit. my celebration? skipping my much wanted mickey d's to come home and eat a frozen bagel out of thrift. jeez, I guess if I was a millionaire I'd starve myself to death. like this lady I read about one time? there was this lady, see. and she only ate cold oatmeal because heating it cost money. and her son had to have his leg amputated because she wouldn't pay for his operation. she died a millionaire. yep, me and that lady. two peas in a pod.

23 days until turning 23. 23's a dumb age, certainly one of the more boring prime numbers. I still haven't decided if I'm going through with it. I might just refuse.

if my hair gets much longer I'm afraid it's going to go into a marlo thomas flip. tomorrow shall be the day of cutting.

and tonight shall be the orgy. okay, okay, identical-triplet-runway-models-from-somewhere-intriguing-like-cyprus, don't rip the sheets, I'm coming.

I should really develop a more efficient way of keeping 4109 clean, but I kinda like my all day/night scrubbing binges. viva saturday night!

I got off work at 10 p.m. last night, which was so odd. there just wasn't any work for anyone to do. that means we'll probably get swamped monday, though. well.

does anyone else find it strange that telekinesis as a method of masturbation hasn't been explored in literature or film? yeah...I was afraid I was alone in thinking so.

back to my romantic evening with the household appliances.

happy new year, everyone. and rabbit rabbit.

new posts at petrified fountain: rat race and george washington. jeez, what a combo. more to come as soon as I get around to it.

my resolutions (which I'm sure to break, now that I'm making them known):
1) stop smoking, cause it's bad for you.
2) eat tofu at least once a week, cause it's good for you.
3) lose ten more pounds.
4) shoot at least one decent film short. hey, it's a start.
5) be more diligent about keeping in touch with people. just in general.

so what will 2004 bring? 2003 gave me a lot of insight into relationships, my personal strengths and weaknesses, and my long-term goals. most importantly, it taught me a lot about being self-sufficient; it's not the scary bugger-all that I always anticipated. I think the key to having a successful new year is to use that knowledge to the best of my ability. yeah. let's hope that works.

speaking of scary bugger-alls, I have to be at the office at 10 a.m. thankfully I am a lazy enough slob to have prepared by sleeping until 7:30 p.m. beforehand so I can just stay up. yee haw!

top 10 things I learned this Christmas:

10) some people put beringer's white zinfandel in spaghetti sauce. um...
9) ball family gatherings are much less interesting when no one over 40 mentions chaka khan. it should be a requirement.
8) love's beef jerky is more addictive than cocaine.
7) pay no attention to the australian guy in the commercial. hoover floormates do not work, and you can get a really nice mop for that kind of money.
6) one sliced ham is not like another.
5) apparently bristol, virginia is totally crunk.
4) I can sleep for 18 hours at a stretch.
3) macado's currently offers a special holiday drink the exact same shade of pink as a victoria's secret bag.
2) medical students find the amputated breasts of cadavers rather boring.
1) messy apartments don't wish their tenants a merry Christmas by cleaning themselves up. it was all a hoax, dammit.

happy yule, y'all. it's been a fine family Christmas up in here. the eve was spent with all of dad's family here at home, washing down mom's famed broccoli casserole with dad's famed bourbon and cokes. Christmas day proper? nuthin. a blessed day of lying around and not shaving.

tonight was the "company dinner" for the consignment shop. a party of 14 converged on the new ultraswank david's restaurant for culinary carnage. then off to the hancocks' house for apertifs and the reading of THE POEM--an annually composed piece that comically lists off all the goings-on at the store. talk about a bourgeois bunch...I kid you not, there was bossanova eminating from somewhere in the house and no fewer than two attorneys present. but it was fun.

tomorrow, Christmas III: The Siblings. rick, debbie, and merry crew invade the old homestead to recreate wednesday with a new cast. then back to good old 4109 and work at the butt-crack of dawn on sunday (read: noon).

got dario. have shot some...typical home movies. also scored a bunch of new stuff that it would be tiresome and braggardly (?) to list here, but I feel loved.

we even had some snow, a dusting.

until I get back to my high speed connection, I wish constant reader a fine few days of afterglow.