I love knowing that there are people in the world crazier than I am. if I actually got vh1 classic, I'd watch the whole hour.

the imminent rise of wal-mart where the mighty carolina circle mall hath fallen is something that I've mentioned here before. since certain people-who-must-not-be-named refused to accompany me on a mission inside the derelict xanadu, here are some fabulous pictures from someone who did venture in. I'm not sure why I'm obsessed with the whole carolina circle affair, but there's a 19 page long thread on urbanplanet.org built up by others who are as well.

now that the sequel is forthcoming, I finally took it upon myself to watch basic instinct this weekend. y'know, that's a pretty damn good movie. and I don't even care about sharon stone's vagina.

justin and I received a $1200 check from wells fargo yesterday. they overestimated our escrow costs and are refunding us the excess money, as well as lowering our house payment permanently by $80 a month. talk about a nice surprise.

thanks be to josh for turning me onto the clientele. such a wonderful band. they're the musical equivalent of a slow, introspective walk through the streets of a small town on an autumn day, the scent of fallen leaves wafting up from your feet.

sorry, that was positively revolting. but they are.

by the way: if you're reading this and personally know me even the teeniest bit and have a blog/journal of your own, do me a favor and send me the link--provided that you don't mind if I link to you. I need to update my left side linkage. those of you over there who don't keep your posts up to date, shame on you. those of you who DO, thanks to you all. you help me remember when I had a social life.

no. NO. enn-ohh NO. absolutely not.

tell me this isn't off kilter. as most of y'all know, isaac hayes is the voice of chef on south park. and of course, south park viciously skewers every societal concept under the sun--I say this with the utmost respect. religion is no exception. over the seasons Jews, Christians, Mormons, etcetera have all been lampooned to the point of even making me blush.

but let the show make fun of scientologists--scientologists--and isaac hayes announces that he's walking.

so much for chef.

on the lighter side, I seem to be doing okay:

This Is My Life, Rated
Life:	7
Mind:	5.9
Body:	6.1
Spirit:	6.7
Friends/Family:	6.2
Love:	9.2
Finance:	8.1
Take the Rate My Life Quiz

more reasons why I'm a disturbed human being:

watching fatal attraction today, I found myself feeling more sympathy for glenn close than michael douglas.

I find websites like this compelling.

I think that socialized medicine is really a fantastic idea...oh, wait. that just makes me normal and sensible. strike this one.

[warning: this implicates other people] just before writing this, I was talking with ali about carl buddig lunch meat. we'd been talking about carl buddig lunch meat for quite some time. the only reason we stopped talking about carl buddig lunch meat was that my phone's battery died.

when I was a kid, I used to call shopping malls around the country and ask for paper directories. they mailed them. I collected them. I had dozens.

I get a little too excited about kitchen utensils. man, there's this honkin pizza cutter at tuesday morning that I want so bad...

ground fog gets me hot.

driving around town, I sometimes feel the urge to stop, get out, and just walk around. just because I'm passing by parts of the earth that I may never touch otherwise.

I really want to go to the cn tower in toronto, lie on the glass observation floor (1,122 feet above ground) and look down. reason this is disturbing: I'm afraid of heights.

I spend what little free time I have making blog posts like this.

lovely!

You're A Prayer for Owen Meany!

by John Irving

Despite humble and perhaps literally small beginnings, you inspire
faith in almost everyone you know. You are an agent of higher powers, and you manifest
this fact in mysterious and loud ways. A sense of destiny pervades your every waking
moment, and you prepare with great detail for destiny fulfilled. When you speak, IT
SOUNDS LIKE THIS!


Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

classic quote (not sure from whom, just read it online somewheres): coming out of the closet is way too much like going through the wardrobe. it's always winter, never Christmas, and I just know there's an EVIL queen lurking about!

I'm really looking forward to the oscars, though I've only seen one of the big five. I missed most of them last year due to a fight with justin, although neither of us can remember what it was about. here's hoping history doesn't repeat itself, although I'm certainly not planning any altercations.

speaking of justin, after getting tired of my complaints about not having enough pics of him, he deemed two more photos suitable for thousand words, so they're in his gallery. I have some great ones of his cat as well (a.k.a. "black willow"), and will add them soon.

and speaking of movies, I know that everyone in the free world is going to blast me for this one...date movie = hilarious. juvenile and tasteless, but hilarious. it also reinforces my belief that alyson hannigan is a goddess. I want to give birth to her children.

of course, if we're talking buffy cast members, nicholas brendon wins out.

I can understand david boreanaz, but drooling over james marsters is just weird.

and I'm a dork. signing off.

saying that something is as easy as taking candy from a baby is awful. unless said baby is choking, why would you take candy from it? there are some sick fucking people in the world.

speaking of sick, I've been there. coughing my fool head off for a week, but I'm finally starting to mend.

(for want of anything better to say at the moment, some pretentious indie babble. so stop reading here if you don't care about music, you damn heathen)

the verdict is in on the life pursuit. this is a remarkable album. it comes across as a synthesis of all that they've accomplished thus far. the elements of kitsch and whimsy evident on dear catastrophe waitress are all here, combined with the introspective lyrical aspects of the band's earlier work. overall the sound is light and peppy, but don't be fooled: there's depth, and then some. it isn't my favorite record of theirs (will tigermilk ever really be trumped?), but it's a gem.

however, it's even easier to gush about rabbit fur coat, from jenny lewis (of rilo kiley) and the watson twins. have mercy. each rilo kiley record has had echos of a vintage country sound, one that lewis' voice is well suited to. rabbit fur coat is positively steeped in the kind of c & w that would make patsy cline feel proud. it sounds like ole jenny is finally doing what she's always wanted. the production is so clear and sharp she could be singing just over my shoulder. on rilo kiley albums (though I love em all) I've noticed that she tends to strain her vocals sometimes, making what could be sweet notes sound forced and harsh. here, she's consistently melodious and natural. stock up on kleenex, get a six pack of your fave american beer, and settle in with this one.

celebrated valentine's day this weekend. dinner at leblon. ever been to a brazilian steakhouse? if you like the idea of continuous meat, it's a good thing.

finally got around to getting the new belle & sebastian, the life pursuit, today. the damn thing's been out since tuesday--I'm slacking off! I'm withholding opinion on it, though, until I've given it 10-15 listens.

famous vocalists should dress in disguise, go to really lame karaoke contests, and sing their own songs. I'd do it. but then, my sense of humor is such that I'd really WANT to lose.

in this month's issue of cargo, monsieur jeremy piven. a sliver of chest is visible, and there is definitely some hair regrowth. maybe there's still hope. I know I'm always getting on my high horse about this, but any guy who routinely waxes his chest/stomach region may as well just cut his balls off, in my opinion. you're a man. take pride in what your testosterone has wrought!

that said, anything on the back and shoulders is negotiable. by all means, nair away.

for years I've been wanting to try jamaican blue mountain coffee. y'know, the stuff that's generally $30+ per pound? I bought a teeeeensy bag today at fresh market and brewed a bit. mmm. I think I understand the appeal, even if my wallet may never quite grasp it.

the quarter life crisis has hit. I really need to put some spice into my life. this drudging through the humdrum week for the promise of a cookie cutter weekend is wearing thin (of course, the time spent with justin makes every weekend worthwhile, but you know). I have little time for hobbies, same problem for extended learning, and I already have a sports car. so far the best I can come up with is taking an online course in esperanto. which, all things considered, is a pretty badass idea.

uck. so many waking hours spent at the office lately. more work equals more money, but sanity can't be bought. I need a rest.

the birthday was good. got the big present from my parents: a chest freezer. am I domestic or what? now when mayfield birthday cake ice cream is buy one get one free I can stock up and get even fatter!

at some point in life I want to become a figurehead of some positive group or organization. figureheads really have it made. all the perks, all the visibility, none of the legwork. it seems like a pretty decent gig.

I have an idea for a new hobby. I'm going to buy a bicycle and equip it with a wire basket and a bell. I'm going to take it to downtown gso around 5:00 and look for pedestrians who seem to be in a hurry. I will then proceed to ride around them in circles ringing my bell and impeding their progress as much as possible. I think it would be good clean fun.

okay, time to clear something up. many of you have heard the rumors of colin farrell's...natural endowments. and of course, there was the whole sex tape leakage that his attorneys managed to get tightly under control. well, almost. let's just say that the file still lurks in some seedy back alleys of the information superhighway.

personally, I call him a "high average." but if most people regard him as humongous, my self esteem should really be a lot higher than it is.

sorry about the period of silence. the past couple of weeks have been very emotional and difficult. I won't get into specifics here; besides, with biological depression compounding everything as usual, anything I could take the time to mention would just be the tip of one big mysterious iceberg. and it's so much easier for me to put a happy face on things in person. when I write I can unwittingly wax overdramatic, hence the not writing. suffice it to say that I'm feeling much more stable, back to being just as happy as a pig in...um, pig heaven or something.

since my e-hiatus was also a break from non-line writing, the brokeback mountain review has yet to see the pixeled page. will it? I'm not sure. for one thing, a lot of the really strong insights I wanted to get down went poof. for another, I'm not sure if I really want to revive petrified fountain or just let it continue to moulder. when I started it up it was so much fun, but at that time I was at a very different place in life. it was so much more...relevant. now doing full length movie reviews just seems like incredibly snooty intellectual masturbation. as opposed to the downmarket anti-intellectual masturbation I do with this blog. we'll see.

birthday's on sunday. hopefully the parents will be able to make it down. as those of you familiar with my policy on aging may be aware, I have only one more birthday for the next thirteen years. I will stop at 26, since to me 27 sounds much too close to 30. I will stay at 26 until I am 39, then rethink my numeric options.

tell you what, though. I'm afraid that within the next year I'm going to have to start dyeing my hair, seriously. the premature threads of gray have been much noticed. and that's not paranoia talking, that's PEOPLE talking, saying to my face, "look! gray hair!" I can understand the distinguished gray thing, but I think that only works post 40. until then it's all about the grecian formula.

anyone catch peter sarsgaard on snl last night? woof. move over aloysius--I think I've found a new teddy bear.

I am really getting perverted in my old age.

I hate these sleepless weekend nights. it's impossible to totally reset my internal clock for normal hours for two days a week, so I always end up slipping out of bed and footling about the house. poor justin, sleeping alone. dreaming of me? perhaps. I dream of justin sometimes. in my subconscious he's exactly the same--face, body, voice. because when you find someone who is so completely perfect for you, it's ridiculous to idealize them in dreams. he's turned my life--every waking and sleeping hour--into the greatest dream I've ever had.

I guess I'd better go and get a late night snack before you, Constant Reader, start to throw up.

back with more soon, but for now just one REALLY important announcement:

after nearly twenty four years of periodic exposure, I've concluded that "harper valley p.t.a." (the original jeannie c. riley version) is the greatest song ever. feel free to argue against that, but I should go ahead and tell you that you'll be wrong.

one more thing and then I'm REALLY going to bed.

a dear friend and I were discussing honorary doctorates the other day.

this just in: yahoo serious has one.

I've been waiting my entire adult life for more people to agree with this:

You scored as The all-round cute gay guy. YOu are a cute guy who many would die to be with..........lucky!! Straight Acting 90% The all-round cute gay guy 90% A Big Bear 70% Raging Queer 30% Straight Queer Basher 30% Straight 10% S + M guy 0% What type of Gay are YOU? created with QuizFarm.com

a few things about altitude:
I'd love to slide down a fire pole someday.
little known fact: I'm afraid of heights indoors (i.e. looking down from the third story in four seasons town center) but generally not outoors.
for some odd reason, I think it's kinda sexy when people in movies/tv shows scale chain link fences.

a promise to loyal (and disloyal) readers: petrified fountain will unfreeze later this week. expect a full review of brokeback mountain, which I saw earlier this evening. will post a link when it's complete.

justin is the greatest guy in the world. I just needed to get that out there, once again.

a phrase that I dislike: "I've never seen that person before in my life." oh, please. you do not know that. unless you yourself are a shut in, or unless the "person" in question resembles the elephant man. there's always a chance that any random human being you see in public may have crossed into your field of vision before.

I've become unhealthily obsessed with my bread machine--a Christmas present from rhonda (justin's mom). never again will there not be a fresh loaf in the nor'easter.

another appliance acquisition: a philips senseo one cup coffeemaker. wow, what a boon to humanity. I love it dearly.

I've been waiting almost two years for this to happen again.

I wrote a complete 5000 word short story tonight. just me at the keys for almost five hours, never stopping for more than a few seconds. and it felt fucking fantastic. the merits of the story are debatable, but the experience of writing for hours on end is such an amazing rush, one that I wish that I could have more often. I crave it like a drug.

and I'm spent.

I am so sick of societally constructed notions of what is and isn't sexy.

I love it when I get to the end of a book (or open it at the beginning) and find a section detailing what font the text is in. one that I was reading recently was actually more of a glowing review, saying, "goudy himself described this font as..." love that.

new year's resolutions that I won't keep:

lose 10+ lbs
exercise at least 2-3 times per week
take better care of teeth
save at least $50 per week
pay more on credit cards
start christmas shopping before t-giving and finish by weekend before
dress like I actually give a crap
don't see hitch (there's really no danger of that happening, but I want it publicly known)

wow. just when you think you're wise to the ways of the world, you find out that brothels have websites (careful--they's boobs on this website, tee hee. be sure to check out "the menu!).

sorry. when I'm in wv the urge to waste time can get a little out of hand.

by the way, I uploaded a few more pictures of willow. these are more recent. sorry the banister ones are a bit blurry, but it's hard to get a cat to stay still for a camera at times.

have you ever turned on the t.v. thinking "there's nothing good on," yet somehow the best thing that could POSSIBLY be on is? it's one of the greatest feelings ever.

thanks, amc, for showing desk set this morning. even though I own it on dvd and have probably watched it 20+ times, somehow it was just perfect today. everyone who likes romantic comedies should see it. everyone who doesn't like romantic comedies should see it. if you think that the phrase "mexican avenue bus" is amusing, you should see it. in short, if for some unearthly reason you haven't, see desk set.

next post will probably be post-Christmas. that said, happy holidays everyone!!!