roads melted. went into work after all. rather tired. situation with mister cheesecake still unresolved.

(since this was such a short post I was going to write it in the form of a telegram, but in researching I found that at no time have telegrams actually used the word "STOP" to separate anything in print. that's unfortunate; I always thought they did.)

it's the apocalypse. they actually let us go home early at work. but then, it is truly a blizzard out there--even by my mountaineer's standards. it is beautiful, but if it doesn't melt a bit I'm going to stun everyone by not going to work tomorrow. I saw too many people sliding into ditches. so there.

time to celebrate the evening with some cheezy movies.

I've been informed that my list of "arguments against gay marriage" is courtesy of the gator gay straight alliance. they seem to do a number of good works.

speaking of the gay, I must now recant on my statement about gentlemens' scarves, as the fellow (a co-worker) who inspired the comment is unfortunately growing on me. no puns, there.

but is he or isn't he?

arguments for:
1) an incredibly snazzy dresser.
2) his hairstyle must take at least ten minutes to get right.
3) a techie (top of the line cell phone, eagerness to discuss computers, and I dunno for sure but he oozes mac nerd).
4) loves cheesecake even though his "never turn out very well." and I quote.
5) seems much more comfortable in female company.
6) most importantly, drives a new vw jetta.

arguments against:
1) voice very masculine, no sign of lisp or nasality.
2) incredibly unsnazzy shoes, rather aged looking sneakers.
3) thumb-flicks his cigarettes (of the two methods used to remove ash from one's cigarette--the finger-tap and the thumb-flick--the finger-tap is most often seen in ladies, 'mos, and people who don't smoke regularly).
4) gestures and expressions tasteful and subdued; no histrionic hissy fits here.

so it seems that he is...but the vibe just isn't quite there. and I'm looking for it, believe me. but cheesecake and a jetta? I don't know why I even bother wondering. (disclaimer: any cheesecake-baking jetta-driving straight men reading this, don't be offended. but do give me your numbers.)

oh, for pete's sake.

You're Ulysses!

by James Joyce

Most people are convinced that you don't make any sense, but compared
to what else you could say, what you're saying now makes tons of sense. What people do
understand about you is your vulgarity, which has convinced people that you are at once
brilliant and repugnant. Meanwhile you are content to wander around aimlessly, taking in
the sights and sounds of the city. What you see is vast, almost limitless, and brings you
additional fame. When no one is looking, you dream of being a Greek folk hero.


Take the Book Quiz
at the Blue Pyramid.

why eating six krystal cheeseburgers is like hiring a high-class call girl: sure it's a great experience, but you still feel dirty and ashamed afterwards. and perhaps--at least in the case of the krystals--a little ill. blaarrggh.

weird esp moment of the day: woke up with "ahab the arab" stuck in my head. haven't heard that in a quite a while (not that I've missed it). it was on the radio when I drove home. it was maybe the fifth time I've ever heard it on the airwaves. and lemme tell you, there are reasons for that.

I just don't know if I could ever date anyone who wears a scarf and tucks it into his coat. y'know, in that formal looking way that guys do? looking back I realize that I've worn my scarf that way before. I never will again.

and while I'm on the subject, I find this funny.

to reiterate my stance pro-gay marriage--and just to share this tasty little bit of satire with everyone--I offer:

Twelve Arguments Against Gay Marriage

1. Homosexuality is not natural, much like eyeglasses, polyester, and birth control.

2. Heterosexual marriages are valid because they produce children. Infertile couples and old people can't legally get married because the world needs more children.

3. Obviously, gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.

4. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage is allowed...since Britney Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage was meaningful.

5. Heterosexual marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are property, blacks can't marry whites, and divorce is illegal.

6. Gay marriage should be decided by people, not the courts, because the majority-elected legislatures, not courts, have historically protected the rights of minorities.

7. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.

8. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.

9. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.

10. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why single parents are forbidden to raise children.

11. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society. Heterosexual marriage has been around for a long time, and we could never adapt to new social norms because we haven't adapted to things like cars or longer lifespans.

12. Civil unions, providing most of the same benefits as marriage with a different name are better, because a "seperate but equal" institution is always constitutional. Seperate schools for African-Americans worked just as well as seperate marriages for gays and lesbians will.

(oh, and I didn't write these myself. but whoever did deserves a medal.)

sometimes I'm so freakish. I went out today with the lofty goal of buying a DVD recorder. the wal-mart across the street was out. the wendover wal-mart was out. so what do I do? I drive to both high point and winston looking for the damn thing and couldn't find one. jeez, I could've called them first.

do you ever have days when everyone you encounter seems to be behaving in a socially unacceptable fashion? today I had to deal with people casually walking right up the middle of lee street (coliseum event or not, that's not okay), wal mart employees standing around and staring at me, and a sketchy random woman asking me for no earthly reason if I whiten my teeth--and then acting confused when I said no. she hadn't even seen my teeth. I'm never leaving the house again.

there's no reason to do a full fledged review of it, I don't think, but if you like suspense/horror/mystery films I can't recommend the changeling highly enough. they don't make 'em like that anymore. go rent it.