randomness:

I'd like to see an ordinance passed restricting the use of pt cruisers to taxicabs. they should all be taken over by cab companies and painted yellow. they'd make good cabs.

I really wanted an apple today, but I didn't want to go to teeter and buy one freaking apple. I thought about asking someone to steal me one from the caf, but it just felt silly.

I've been thinking in important words all day, I dunno why. "eschew" and "pontificate" keep popping up in my head to describe things. "boon" and "clandestine," too. I often write like that, but never think as such. I should write an essay on something, anything, and get it all out of my system.

tears welled up in my eyes today in my car cuz belle and sebastian came on and I felt all sad that I missed out on their contest. see, they were "auditioning" fans/reporters to come and chill with them based on 200 word essays on why they should. said fan/reporter would interview them about various things and get drunk with the whole crew (I feel qualified to do both, and I'm sure they'd agree). I didn't know that the deadline was so soon; I would have stated my case beautifully. still, can't believe I got all teary about it. hell, yes I can.

okay, I guess that's it then.

I should really be trying to sleep (test tomorrow, blecch), but I wanted to recap all the weird shit that has made up the past two days first. yesterday my alarm didn't go off (I forgot to turn it on) and I slept through my two day classes. when I woke up I was really depressed about that, so I kept making myself go back to sleep. ever done that? anyway, I finally got up and decided I was too upset to go to night class either, so I went for a drive. I drove all the way to roanoke, in fact. I bought some mill mountain coffee, ate dinner, and drove back. I felt better then.

that doesn't change the fact that I am so apt to have little "brain tantrums" like that. I mean, how many times have I "run away" from school, just gone home without telling anyone? no less than three mental health professionals have pronounced me to be of sound mind, but sometimes I wonder. it's can't just be ADD at fault. sometimes I really scare myself. a lot.

so tonight I was spending a pleasant evening with charles when my phone rang. first my room, then my cell. I answered it neither time, but checked my messages after c. had left. it was joey again, both times. wants to talk, he says. sounded friendly enough, but the timing of the call was enough to weird me out. I guess I'll give him a buzz; one call can't hurt. it's just that even hearing his voice now throws me off kilter. a lotta water under that bridge, folks. more than anyone could ever imagine.

oh, if only I can get through tomorrow. then I'll turn over a beautiful new leaf and lead a life of unparallelled normalcy. but how many times have I said that before...

okay, I'm REALLY going to bed soon, I just wanted to post one thing:

Intriguing Things Said About “the Gay” by Hot Straight (?) Celebs:

“Well, I mean, there’s nothing wrong with being gay, so to deny it is to make a judgment.”--Keanu Reeves

“If I was gay, that wouldn't be a big deal, so why would I hide it?”—Justin Timberlake (one of Advocate’s Coolest Straight People of 2002)

“I look at Brad Pitt, and I will never, and could never, look like that. He is just incredible to look at. Period. If I were gay, he would be one of the posters on my wall.”—Matt Damon

“‘Wilde’ was a gay movie, my part was gay, I have a lot of gay mates, and Atti [bisexual actor and best friend Andre Schneider] is a good kisser. That's all I have to say about this. I won't admit or deny anything. Makes me more interesting.”—Orlando Bloom

“I honestly think I could be happy being gay, but I like women too much to make the switch.”—Stephen Dorff

“Most of my male friends are gay ... I consider myself to be straight only because I've never had a homosexual experience.”—Guy Pearce

“When we become educated, prejudices go out the window. All prejudices are based on ignorance, and as people learn more about gay men and women, they realize they're really no different, they have the same problems.”—Dean Cain

“It's cool to be gay.”—Mark Wahlberg (post-Marky Mark, obviously)

whatta weekend. last night was very amusing. my wonderful, amazing apartment-mates bought me a chick-fil-a nugget tray as a late birthday present. naturally I shared. gabe brought over a bottle of the captain, and several of us got quite giddy.

after a drunken singalong in ashley's suite, I went with her and carra to house of breakfast after we'd sobered up. after we ate carra said something like, "you know, we should really go see that big chair that's around here sometime." I replied, "wanna go now?"

so at 5:30 a.m. we found ourselves in thomasville standing around the big chair. we confused passing cars by pointing up at it. fell into bed around 7. it rocked.

I was very displeased with charles, however. he went to a party at 9 but said he'd leave and be back by 11. he never showed. he called today to apologize, writing off his negligence to an abundance of booze and bud. I dunno--I've never been so substanced that I couldn't make a simple phone call. I'm still fuming.

had a nice, girly evening tonight with ali, a whitman's sampler, and "roman holiday." nothing like audrey hepburn and chocolate to boost your outlook on life.

carra and I had a great discussion last night about how no girl should EVER tell her gay guy friend that their friendship is "just like will and grace." then, on the phone tonight, cassie did exactly that. is it really necessary to pigeonhole a relationship into a neat, tidy, pop culture metaphor? after being on the "will" end of several interactions, I can tell you that it starts to feel rather patronizing.

to those of you who haven't seen "fellini's 8 1/2," do it. I was watching my dvd tonight, and was reminded that the sequence with the dancing prostitute, saraghina, is the funniest thing in any film EVER.

sun's coming up, must be time to go to sleep.