lucky.

1) I'm lucky to have my job. it's pleasant, steady, and I have some great co-workers. most importantly, it provides me with enough money to buy pretty much whatever I want. okay, no new maserati or anything. but if I feel like picking up some godiva chocs or some dvds or somethin, I can just go and do it.

2) I'm lucky to live in greensboro. it's large enough to be entertaining (anyone who complains about gso being boring just doesn't look around enough) but small enough to feel safe and familiar.

3) I'm lucky to live with josh. there aren't many people that I can really speak with and say whatever's on my mind without fear of seeming too random, too dense, or just flat out annoying. stream of consciousness relationships are rare; I tally up three in my lifetime. so it's good to live with one.

4) I'm lucky to have my apartment. granted it's a hellish commute to t-vegas from here, but not even in the chair city could we get a place like ours for the price.

5) I'm lucky to have my friends here. they're such a kooky bunch, and they all seem to understand when I get too caught up in my own little world to be with them as much as I'd like.

[furrows brow, ponders leaving greensboro]

unrelated note: does anyone remember the part in the stand where the scientist becomes obsessed with the spinning centrifuge in the laboratory filled with dead workers? how he consults the computer to ascertain the likelihood of the thing burning out before he goes friggin nuts? I feel his pain. the dryer must be repaired before the squeaking drives me bananas.

oh, and new links to your left.

good night at work. read p.g. wodehouse, discovered that an error had been made in my favor, and only a little overtime.

sad that wesley clark has bowed out of the running for prez biz. but I, like many americans I'm sure, am willing to throw my support behind whichever democratic candidate is chosen at the last. I'll bet even the 'rents are with me on this one. (former bush supporters both, although dad's usually as much a straight-ticket democrat as mom's a straight-ticket r-word. examining their political beliefs shows their policies to be even more absurd than they would be in most people.)

vague rumors of nasty weather prompted a d.j. to humorously remind his listeners to buy milk and bread. which made me think that the same people who run out to buy those things would also advise people to boil water when a woman is delivering a baby-- there's no concrete reason for doing that, by the way, at least not that I've found. one theory is that it was traditionally done to keep the expectant father out from under foot. I believe that. anyway:

if milk + bread = dumb and milk + bread = boiling water, then milk + bread = boiling water. you can't argue with that. no. don't even try.

new at petrified fountain: bubba ho-tep. see, I told you I'd review something new.

wackta weekend. little party at mary hobbs with the carra crew that got busted up and slapped with a fine. I paid out eight bucks for beer that got confiscated. hey, it was worth the excitement. although it might not be worth the alcohol fine for our gracious host, though we all offered to chip in.

to chapel hill tonight to see the aforementioned film. also went to strong's coffee, where I boggled at the energetic groups of fresh young collegiates talking about important things. culture and things. I thought, "gee. I miss doing that." then I realized that I never really did that. oh well.

signs of continuing spiral into madness:
1) newly piqued interest in kraftwerk
2) wearing a tie when drinking ritz brand soda (even with no one around to chuckle at it)
3) increasing ability to relate to aunt ada doom in cold comfort farm
4) overhearing at least one conversation a day that I dismiss as "bourgeois"
5) wondering too often if getting shot in the leg with a small caliber bullet could really hurt all that much

hi-ho!

new at petrified fountain: laurel canyon. one day I'll actually review something new, I promise.

went to wv for a coupla days, and it was nice. seeing the friggin superbowl wasn't so nice, but we put up a good fight. and I'm sure that some dirty fan fiction will turn up involving jake delhomme giving tom brady his comeuppance. I mean, can't you see it? some macho guy in a sports bar somewhere, eating hot wings, just itching for the game to be sewn up so he can see which q.b. should take the dominant and submissive (or offensive and defensive, if you will) roles in some juicy gay porn lit for the messageboards? hey, I don't write it. I just read it.

michelle said something the other day about a woman being "dressed to the teeth." can someone be dressed to the teeth? I know that one can be armed to the teeth, but I thought you had to be dressed to the nines. furthermore, what the hell are the nines?

I've been sort of down lately. just in general. dunno why. but I've decided to do one thing every day to better my situation, even if it's something dumb. like my piles of laundry, which are currently being washed. as a comfort plan it doesn't beat chocolate, but it also has fewer side effects. because ice cream makes your waist big. on the sides. but on the front too. jeez, I get dumber every day.

I had initially planned to integrate finishing all my applications by the end of the week into this plan, but my bank card has been cancelled due to fraudulent transactions, and I won't get the new one for a bit. hmm...I've only ever used it at secure sites, but somehow a net merchant calling itself "interbill" tampered around with it. I must be more vigilant.

oh, regarding my earlier "piano man" post. I really misunderstood that song as a kid; I forgot to mention my misheard lyric. to me, the line "the piano sounds like a carnival" sounded like "the piano sounds like a commodore," making me think that the instrument was emitting boops and beeps like those of a commodore 64. hey, I grew up in the 80s. it was in context.

thomas edison quit his job to start a laboratory.
charles lindbergh graduated from flight school.
sylvia plath graduated from smith and won a fulbright scholarship to cambridge.
lawrence olivier acted in his first film.
tim burton first got work in the film industry—as an animator at disney.
van morrison recorded astral weeks.
elvis costello recorded my aim is true.

I wonder if I'll do anything important while I'm 23?

also, I've seen this on a couple of other blogs and since mine is kinda funny:



create your own visited states map
or check out these Google Hacks.

heh. california's all out there and shit.

gso, post storm. while much of the triad has been icebound, I've been slip-sliding away to work these past couple of days. yesterday only 11 people showed (out of the usual 70), but today was better. hopefully the roads will keep clearing up, although the purty white stuff can stay on the ground for a while.

finally bought the b&s for fans only dvd (sorry carra, but I had to get it at fye--borders was closed and couldn't find it anywhere else). fie on anyone who doesn't at least get moved into contemplative silence by "this is just a modern rock song." stuart murdoch WILL be mine. as soon as he gets over that whole straight/not knowing who I am thing.

actually, I could walk up to 90% of the people on the street and say, "hi. I'm stuart murdoch, and I'm the lead singer of a band called belle and sebastian," and no one would know any different. I could get to know these people, make them my friends. they'd call, "hey, stuart!" on the street, legitimizing it. popular opinion could decree that I am, in fact, stuart murdoch.

maybe I am. wow. cool.

just for giggles, let's see what I ate today:
2 cinnabon minibons (22g fat, 600 cal)
1 bag puff pastry cookies (I dunno; let's be kind and say 10g fat and 300 cal)
1 sheetz smokehouse burger (52g fat, 860 cal)
1 sheetz bucket o fryz (based on wendy's, around 25g fat and 530 cal)
TOTAL (not including beverages): 109g fat, 2290 cal.

oh, and 5 cigs. I'm going to hell. soon, with clogged arteries. I really need to watch it; I've really started to give my feet the appreciation they deserve now that I can see them.

I'm wearing my retainers for the first time in like a year. go me.

I think I'm going to make it my mission to move to canada; specifically to banff, because banff pisses me off. my fourth grade teacher showed us dozens of slides from her visit there (what a miss brodie thing to do!), and it is beautiful. but there's a population cap of 10k people, and you have to meet about that many requirements to live there at all. even buying property there is illegal if you don't rent it to a "legal resident." so I'm going to find a way. just wait. then I'm going to walk the streets, point at tourists and say,"I live here and you don't." fuckin-a.

can I just say what a shockingly small difference my seemingly large raise has made in my paycheck? hardly enough to keep me in stockings and fans. or cashmere and godiva, if you will.

I really shouldn't complain so much.

speaking of work, got my w2 from united. soon I'll get the one from o.d. then I have to figure out what to do with them.

y'know the line in billy joel's "the piano man" that goes "they sit at the bar/and put bread in my jar?" when I was a kid I thought people were actually giving him bread.

12 hours of work yesterday and 9 today. kooky stuff. computers are still acting retarded (p.c. be damned, the computers are retarded. it's the only word. if they get offended I'll delete this).

although I still went to burlington for krystal munchies after work. and I don't regret a mile of it.

weekend coming up. hmm. maybe I'll call tia. she must think I'm dead.

I've yet to see the triplets of belleville in the listings of any theaters within an hour radius, and I'm getting irritated about it.

gotta run. billy joel just came in, arms laden with baked goods. must have been a good night at the 88s (I love it when people refer to piano keys as 88s).

oh, and at petrified fountain: monstrously long-winded review of big fish and the only golden globes picks you need.

tonight's theme: work.

variations on theme:

typical. everyone went home at 9:30 tonight. they were trying to fix a problem we've been having with the computers and ended up making them worse. now we all go in early and stay late tomorrow. but hey, it's still fun to have an evening off.

optimistic. just in case I do end up relocating this fall, I've been able to find a number of jobs in my interested locales that I'd be uber-qualified for. and I'd only have to take a slight pay cut...well, it's still comforting to know that I should have a much easier time finding work than I did last summer.

silly and conceited. I wore that new banana republic outfit to work yesterday and no one even commented on it! now I'm all self-conscious that it doesn't look so nice after all. hmmph.

did get to winston today. scored a cashmere sweater at like 60% off. dinner at olive garden with j and b (heh...that's a whiskey) followed by a movie, big fish, which I plan to do a lengthy p.f. post about soon. but for now, I say this: see it. please. it's one of only 4 or 5 films I've seen that have honestly made me examine life from a different perspective.

and it's put me in an introspective mood. that and a fun night out with ashley and carra at jake's, followed by buffy and snuggling with carra here. but anyway, here's the thing. I realize that I've become so caught up with my routine and my everyday goals--work, make money, do the basic things I have to do to get by--that I've lost sight of how multifaceted the human mind can be. well, maybe it's less that and more losing sight of the human spirit. I'm not saying that I've become more of a machine than a man (perish the robotic thought). but it's a friendly reminder to acknowledge that I need, to use the old cliche, to get a life.

I'm working on it. because nights like tonight remind me that a life is a good thing to have.

jake's must be slipping narcotics into their waffles, because I'm so tired. well, it is sunrise and about my bedtime, after all. ta.

and speaking of trendy, as lame as it is I thoroughly enjoy liquidgeneration. in fact, I shall now indulge in posting my results from one of their quizzes:

I didn't see the whole thing and so won't do a review, but I saw most of best laid plans the other night and actually sort of/maybe/probably liked it. I have to give her credit; throughout her career reese witherspoon has made some really commendable (and varied) role choices.

but mostly I think I just like alessandro nivola, who has become my new celeb crush. it's a good one I think--not common enough to be generic but conventionally handsome enough to wear with pride. in fact, he's finally pushed me into renting laurel canyon (I've meant to anyway). however, I will NOT rent jurassic park 3 regardless.

(note: I just highlighted and deleted a lengthy rant on the label "college rock" and mtv execs that I had typed here. my arguments weren't developed enough. but don't say "college rock;" it's even worse than the aforementioned p-word.)

I'd like to stay up and hit the trough for breakfast, but I'd also like to go to winston to shop tomorrow. which entails waking up before sunset. so off I go to curl up in bed with a cup of hot rooibos (at the risk of seeming trendy if not...gulp...outright metrosexual, have y'all tried the stuff? it's goooood).

HOLY SHIT! apparently TWO sheetz stores are being built on wendover avenue (he says stuffed full of the buffalo chicken and fryz that he just drove to virginia to get, cursing nicole for making him an addict)! that's the best news ever. EVERRRRR!

that's all for now. I'm too overcome to write any more.

oh, and one more thing.

anyone conversing with me is forbidden to use the word "pundit."

I'm tired of it.

I'll just walk away, really. try me.

question.

which version of this line from "puttin on the ritz" do you prefer?
A) come let's mix where rockefellers waltz with sticks or umbrellers in their mitts
B) come let's mix where rockefellas waltz with sticks or umbrellas in their mitts

I think that B was irving berlin's original lyric, but I have a strong preference for version A, as sung by gene wilder in young frankenstein. true, taco did sing version B, but I have to stand my ground on this one.

remember back in the day when eeeeeveryone used freeman skin/hair care products? what happened? you can still get them, but they're hard to find. I remember at one point in the mid-90s I regularly used the apricot facial scrub, the raspberry body scrub, the cucumber face mask, AND the sunflower hair infusion. I'm totally going to instigate a freeman revival. the gay teenage boys of today need to recognize.

currently working on: stop smoking, take 15.8 or so. once again, I've stocked up on gum. I think my mistake before was relying on extra. a situation of this magnitude calls for bubblicious.

I've compiled a list of the funniest things my friends have ever said (at least, the ones I can think of right now). taken out of context makes some even funnier. at the risk of pissing people off, they are ranked--with #1 being my favorite.

20. where is chair? I come from russia to see chair!
19. don’t test me; I’m unmedicated.
18. what goes on in there? HEY!
17. heh…paleface.
16. I knew a girl named rutago. she was a spice.
15. hey naked lady!
14. God bless the prostitutes.
13. when they put their heads under the water. that’s when you get ‘em.
12. I’ve been dead for three years!
11. I can handle this high performance vehicle.
10. isn’t there something about roseanne roseanna danna that’s “comin for to carry you home?”
9. caffeine suppositories? I’ll bet those really get your ass goin.
8. bread man won’t be here ‘til tuesday.
7. please. you’re paying more money for less doors. what’s the point in that?
6. josh one, autoharps zero.
5. they stand on their own.
4. that tree’s diseased.
3. well, the native americans are an ancient people.
2. he’s gone mental on account of the witch skin!
1. I don’t have any Indian food, but I can give you a toasted waffle and a picture of jude law.

hanging with heather (both heathers, actually) was a blast. saw the station agent again; was even better the second time. cute waiter at harper's, as well.

since it was sunday, tonight was girly spa night. I'm thoroughly scrubbed, exfoliated, moisturized. and ready for bed.